Let me fill you in on a little 411. As moms we tend to do everything, we are the heart of the family, the heart of the home, we are continuously going, continuously worrying, forgetting things till the last minute. Our minds run a million miles a minute, going in a thousand different directions. Do you agree? If not you have a nanny or you’re just one lucky mom!
I have learned that it’s not simply the kids that causes my exhaustion, well for the most part. Have you actually glanced over your long list of things you manage on a daily basis? If not, Sit down and write a list for me of things that you do from day to day. You will seriously be surprised, just like keeping a food diary…eeeek, no Bueno! I mean from the time the alarm goes off till you lay down for the night, make that list!
In the end, you will learn why you’re really exhausted! It’s everything you do as a mom, full-time career, stay at home mom and wife. The meal preparation, cleaning, the organizing of the home, feeding the animals, running to the bank, gift-buying, gift wrapping, grocery shopping, laundry, sports practices, school activities, holiday cooking and decorating, emails, phone calls, paperwork, crying babies, hungry teenagers, kids stealing your phone to take selfies 🙄….
This, my FREAKING AWESOME moms, is why we have a tendency to constantly be exhausted. Not because our kids are driving us to insanity, not because we are not getting enough sleep with the snoring husband beside us who sounds like he could knock the house down, but because we have SO MUCH on our plate that we are expected to do or if we don’t do it, it doesn’t get done.
Fact is, there really is a
The endless running of our to-do list in our pretty little heads is that mental load we moms carry with us every day, even at work. No, I am not saying dads don’t fall in the role of mom duties, trust me I know plenty of dads that play the role of mom and dad. So when I talk about “MOM” in this blog or ANY of my blogs, a mom could be the biological mom, the dad, the grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends, any relative’s, Foster’s, etc.
So who has encountered the famous line from your spouse or significant other “you should have asked”? OH MY GAAAAH, this to me is like hearing nails on a chalkboard! We shouldn’t have to ask, right? You would think their smart little brains could tell we needed help when we walk in the house with 10 bags of groceries hanging from our arms, and a gallon of milk barely hanging off our pinky! Nope, we get a “HEY BABE HOW WAS YOUR DAY OR WHAT’S FOR DINNER!?”
This my friends explain why mom’s carry the bulk of what needs to be done in the house! If they can’t see you need help walking in with the groceries, do you honestly think they can remember when your next carpool day is?
So the big question is, Should we really have to ask?
YEP! Suck it up buttercup mom of the year, shove your ego under the bed and dive in to ask for help on that long ass to do list that’s there for you every day! I have learned this over the years, they will come ONLY when they are asked! Bless their hearts we keep them on track, God knows they would run out of underwear if it wasn’t for us!
So a Typical Day in My Life?
Here it goes, I wake up to let the animals out in the morning to do their deed, I make sure they have water, feed the cats, make sure my daughter is awake and her lunch is packed, I set packages out to be shipped for the husband so he can sleep longer. Meanwhile, I have to get ready myself, make the animals come back in give them their morning treats and shove them back in the kennels so the husband does not have shit to clean up when he finally rolls outta bed for second shift.
I have my daughter to school by 7:15am and I’m at work normally 30 minutes early. This is where I fix my coffee because I didn’t have time to make it that morning. I work through my lunches in order to pick my daughter up from school, because we live too close for the bus and too far away for a teenager to be walking alone. I rush back to work to finish my day.
When the time comes and it’s time to go home, well it’s normally not straight home it’s to the grocery store then home and do my just got home to do list, or I’m running home immediately to let the animals out to do their business, feed them make sure they have water, start dinner if there is time. Certain days of the week I have 30 minutes to do all of that and have my daughter to volleyball practice by 6 for 2 hours. Guess what, I might get a shower and
The husband sleeps till he wakes up with no alarm, slowly makes his way to the coffee pot and sits on the couch to watch tv as he wakes up drinking his morning java and eating something for breakfast. He gets ready for work and most days forgets to put the dogs in the kennel leaving me with a mess when I get home. He will mop, unload a load of dishes or throw in a load of clothes before he leaves sometimes.
Most days I get a text that he should have packed himself some food …….. no worries honey I didn’t get to drink my coffee nor eat at all today, I am quite positive you will live till you get off work! He gets off work, changes clothes grab’s something to eat, and to the couch, he goes! Yes, he works at home through our online business when not at his job during the week, but adding that to his tasks compared to mine is not even remotely equal!
So the burden of this mental load is all mine! I’m the one worrying, thinking, and planning as I lay awake in bed every night. However honestly, if I did none of this he and the kids would be fine. He may feed them McDonald’s or frozen dinners and geez I would hate to see what he would dress the kids in, but in reality, the day would keep on ticking by, unfortunately, maybe not the way we want it to go but it definitely would keep going. The worst case scenario and I know because i did it. I posted a letter to the family around the kitchen, that I was on vacation for a week and not to ask me for anything or do anything, they were on their own! LOL, guess what? That’s right the dishes were not done the trash spilling out of the trashcan, needless to say, my week vacation turned into a 2-day trainwreck!
That my awesome mamas, is why we’re so exhausted all the time!
Until next time my friends, keep your sanity, keep being an awesome mom, better yet go do something for you!